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Saturday, March 13, 2010
她和他的故事.
Why did you lie to her? Don't like her? You can just say it out, tell her the truth. She was naive enough to believe you. All the things that you fabricated, she believed it and love you with all her heart. A love that she holds on for so long, for 4years. Okay, maybe not love but rather, like. But still! You should not have lied to her! You've moved on, way faster than her, when she was still naively waiting for you. I wonder where is your conscious.
'i will never go out with a girl that is younger than my sis. She was born on 5th January 1990, a day younger than her also can't '
FUCK! YOUR SIS IS NOT BORN ON THAT DAY! AND NOW? YOU ARE DATING WITH A GIRL WHO IS YOUNGER THAN YOUR SIS!
'No. I don't have a gf.'
FUCK! You had one! Do you know that she was so sad that day? When she saw you fetching your gf home? She just wished that she could just disappeared into the thin air. You could jollywell told her that very day when she bumped into you while you were waiting for your gf. BUT YOU DIDN'T! Everytime she was so scared to bump into you and your gf. Saw you guys at the train station and had to hide and pretended not to see you guys.
'Oh! Could you just tell her to stop contacting me? I don't want to give her a wrong impression and think that I like her.'
FUCK! Who was the one always contacting the other one? You should know the answers well. Who was the one who always call her in the middle of the night when he couldn't find anyone to talk to? She was (dumb)enough to answer your call and chatted with you, despite there was no conversations at time, she was still willing to hold on to the phone and companied you. She always waited for you to initiate to put down the phone. She feared that she might disappoint you and then you had no one to talk to, if she initiated it first. Feeling hungry in the middle of the night? She was willing to sacrifice her sleep and the consequences of sneaking out of the house to just company you to eat supper. Sleep was so important to her, especially when she was always caught dozing off to sleep in class, but she just so willing to give it up for the sake of you. Who was the one who called to her house looking for her when she was away for a school trip? Who was the one who contacted her when she returned? Who was the one who asked her out for a movie? You! You! You! Everything was initiated by you!
Where is your conscious? Maybe you didn't have one, then. You were happily using her especially when you were feeling bored and lonely. Maybe it was not totally your fault as well. She was dumb and a fool as well. Dumb and foolish enough to be used by you and thought that heaven is kind enough to her by sending you to her side and thought that you were sincered about everything. She was wrong, so wrong.
You have moved on and so have she. But she was always trapped in those memories that you had once given her. But, soon enough, I'm sure she will be able to let it go. She is able to and she will. Someone who is sincere to her and loved her with all his heart is what she truly wants. And she had found that someone special and loved him with all her heart. So have you and she sincerely gives you her blessings.
Time to let go and set herself free.
Why did you lie to her? Don't like her? You can just say it out, tell her the truth. She was naive enough to believe you. All the things that you fabricated, she believed it and love you with all her heart. A love that she holds on for so long, for 4years. Okay, maybe not love but rather, like. But still! You should not have lied to her! You've moved on, way faster than her, when she was still naively waiting for you. I wonder where is your conscious.
'i will never go out with a girl that is younger than my sis. She was born on 5th January 1990, a day younger than her also can't '
FUCK! YOUR SIS IS NOT BORN ON THAT DAY! AND NOW? YOU ARE DATING WITH A GIRL WHO IS YOUNGER THAN YOUR SIS!
'No. I don't have a gf.'
FUCK! You had one! Do you know that she was so sad that day? When she saw you fetching your gf home? She just wished that she could just disappeared into the thin air. You could jollywell told her that very day when she bumped into you while you were waiting for your gf. BUT YOU DIDN'T! Everytime she was so scared to bump into you and your gf. Saw you guys at the train station and had to hide and pretended not to see you guys.
'Oh! Could you just tell her to stop contacting me? I don't want to give her a wrong impression and think that I like her.'
FUCK! Who was the one always contacting the other one? You should know the answers well. Who was the one who always call her in the middle of the night when he couldn't find anyone to talk to? She was (dumb)enough to answer your call and chatted with you, despite there was no conversations at time, she was still willing to hold on to the phone and companied you. She always waited for you to initiate to put down the phone. She feared that she might disappoint you and then you had no one to talk to, if she initiated it first. Feeling hungry in the middle of the night? She was willing to sacrifice her sleep and the consequences of sneaking out of the house to just company you to eat supper. Sleep was so important to her, especially when she was always caught dozing off to sleep in class, but she just so willing to give it up for the sake of you. Who was the one who called to her house looking for her when she was away for a school trip? Who was the one who contacted her when she returned? Who was the one who asked her out for a movie? You! You! You! Everything was initiated by you!
Where is your conscious? Maybe you didn't have one, then. You were happily using her especially when you were feeling bored and lonely. Maybe it was not totally your fault as well. She was dumb and a fool as well. Dumb and foolish enough to be used by you and thought that heaven is kind enough to her by sending you to her side and thought that you were sincered about everything. She was wrong, so wrong.
You have moved on and so have she. But she was always trapped in those memories that you had once given her. But, soon enough, I'm sure she will be able to let it go. She is able to and she will. Someone who is sincere to her and loved her with all his heart is what she truly wants. And she had found that someone special and loved him with all her heart. So have you and she sincerely gives you her blessings.
Time to let go and set herself free.
Sunday, March 7, 2010
A levels result are out and my results are like suck cock! Won't be able to get into a good course. No, I don't even know if I can get my ass into uni now. Who am I to judge whether the course sucks or not! Should I retake? I saw the grade profile of all the unis in Singapore and I think I really can't make it. What I wanna do now is to just party!! I wanna party away all my troubles and problems. Yea, I sound like a hermit, but maybe I am one.
Went clubbing with Andee and kel yesterday, I really enjoyed it ttm! I think I will be hooked on to clubbing! The music, the drinks and the people. Went drinking and sheesha the day I got my suck cock results. Went clubbing and smoking yesterday! Can life be any better than this? Now, after I tried smoking, I really don't see any problem with smoking. I love the feeling. Andee said I smoked like a noob, well, I am one. But as time goes by, I know I won't be one anymore.
It is time to rebel and breakaway. Had enough of all the restrictions. Maybe I'm just too fucking disappointed in myself for getting such suck cock results and for wasting my time for the past one year when I should be concentrating and focus on my studies. I just wanna let myself fall and just fall.
Things happened yesterday. Had some drinks with Kel's friends outside Zouk before we went to Supperclub. Had around 4 cups of Martel + coke. Was a bit high when we got to Supperclub. Music was loud, dancefloor was packed, everything was crazy. I danced with this jap guy, I was careless, almost got into trouble. Thank god Andee and Kel were with me and saved me! Thanks guys!
Was I really being careless or I'm just asking for the trouble? I seriously don't know. Or maybe I just want to let myself fall and be slutty and a whore. Maybe this is the life that I wanna lead for punishing myself? I know that in a club girls must really protect themselves from those pervetic jerks and yet I allowed myself to lose control and throw myself into their arms.
Went clubbing with Andee and kel yesterday, I really enjoyed it ttm! I think I will be hooked on to clubbing! The music, the drinks and the people. Went drinking and sheesha the day I got my suck cock results. Went clubbing and smoking yesterday! Can life be any better than this? Now, after I tried smoking, I really don't see any problem with smoking. I love the feeling. Andee said I smoked like a noob, well, I am one. But as time goes by, I know I won't be one anymore.
It is time to rebel and breakaway. Had enough of all the restrictions. Maybe I'm just too fucking disappointed in myself for getting such suck cock results and for wasting my time for the past one year when I should be concentrating and focus on my studies. I just wanna let myself fall and just fall.
Things happened yesterday. Had some drinks with Kel's friends outside Zouk before we went to Supperclub. Had around 4 cups of Martel + coke. Was a bit high when we got to Supperclub. Music was loud, dancefloor was packed, everything was crazy. I danced with this jap guy, I was careless, almost got into trouble. Thank god Andee and Kel were with me and saved me! Thanks guys!
Was I really being careless or I'm just asking for the trouble? I seriously don't know. Or maybe I just want to let myself fall and be slutty and a whore. Maybe this is the life that I wanna lead for punishing myself? I know that in a club girls must really protect themselves from those pervetic jerks and yet I allowed myself to lose control and throw myself into their arms.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
It's confirmed, A Level results will be out this Friday. I seriously don't think I can make it. Been having weird dreams bout my results and had this vision that I will get B,C,D,E. Goodbye! The enjoyment of studying! I think I will be crying on that day, shall bring dozens of packets of tissue. I dread the moment that I get my result and I dread telling mum the bad news. I dread reaching home seeing her disappointed look and tell me how well her friend's daughter did. I dread going to work and my colleagues will ask me how I did. I dread and I dread. But there is nothing that can be done, becoz it will all soon become a reality.
Re-take or UniSim? Guess this will be the question that I have to ask myself on the day the release of result, not NUS or SMU or NTU.
Re-take or UniSim? Guess this will be the question that I have to ask myself on the day the release of result, not NUS or SMU or NTU.